I read Twilight so you don't have to // CHAPTER 8: PORT ANGELES
La Bella Italia
A Summary: Bella and friends go to Port Angeles to shop for the upcoming dance. When Bella stumbles into danger, Edward swoops in to rescue her, they eat Italian food, and play another round of 20 Questions.
Outfits:
I think Bella wears a blue shirt. I know this only because Edward comments that she “looks good in blue”.
Also, Edward’s wearing clothes, and they are…beige, in every sense of the word.
Beige. Skin-tight. Leather. Nothing says “vampire” like dressing like a car seat.
My Thoughts:
Bella, Jessica, and Angela pile in the car for a dress-shopping trip, all the while Bella condescendingly describes the music as “whiny” and Jessica’s talking as “jabbering,” because apparently enjoying things is for other girls.
Jessica informs Bella that Tyler is planning to ask her to prom. Bella pretends to be annoyed about this, and the “trying on dresses montage” begins, minus Bella, of course. She’d rather be at the bookstore.
When I was in high school, my friends and I would do the classic dress-shopping-montage for dances and proms, armed with my duct tape purse and $30 cash from babysitting bratty kids from church. My friend would document everything on her chunky digital camera that took forever to load between shots (where we would later upload these to Facebook albums. I’ve taken the liberty of deleting these💀). After a few stores, I’d get overstimulated by the fluorescent lights, but that was nothing a soft pretzel and food court trip couldn't fix. The whole operation needed military precision since Mom was picking me up at 3pm sharp in the JCPenney parking lot.
The mall was our oyster. We loved trying on clothes, looking at books, trinkets, and treats. I also loved Hot Topic, and treasured my very first (and last) Nightmare Before Christmas hoodie (firstly, shut up, and secondly, that’s where my Twilight origin story begins…) It’s more about hanging out together and enjoying each others’ company. But if you’re not like other girls, well, you prefer something more independent, and intellectually stimulating, I guess.
Bella is on parr Elizabeth Bennet, or Belle, or Jane Eyre. Classic trick: quote a classic heroine, borrow her depth. She’s the hero Forks deserves, but not the one it needs right now.
Bella excuses herself from the girly stuff to go out by herself and find a bookstore. In a new town. Alone. I’m thinking back to all the times Edward mentions to Bella that she’s a “magnet for trouble”, and all the times she casts herself as the damsel in distress. But when she pulls reckless stunts like this and acts surprised when things go sideways, it’s hard to muster sympathy.
Surprise surprise, Bella gets lost in an unfamiliar town and notices a group of men trailing her, “herding” her like prey. It’s the kind of thing every woman is taught to fear from approximately age eight. But don’t worry because her personal vampire in a Volvo has been silently stalking her (for her safety, of course) and is ready to swoop in and save the day. Don’t you worry, ladies.
Edward, having saved Bella, insists that she eat something and takes her to La Bella Italia. He dismisses her friends and says he’ll drive Bella home, and she’s all too eager to play another game of 20 Questions with him.
Bella loves Edward telling her what to do. She slurps that sh*t right up. He orders her to eat, and she cheerfully pops a ravioli in her mouth. He orders her to get in his car and she acts like it’s both charming and inevitable. He opens the door for her, pays for her food—which is all disguised as gentlemanly behavior, or would be if he didn’t fall into angry moodswings whenever she doesn’t obey. The dynamic feels borderline infantilizing. And the book plays it completely straight, like this is peak swoon. I hate it. It’s icky and I hate it.
The waitress spends the whole time batting her eyelashes at Edward, completely ignoring Bella. Of course, by the end, Edward only has eyes for Bella because in this universe, *other women* are just background noise for Bella’s ego :)
Bella doesn’t feel like eating or drinking, and only does when Edward insists. She keeps commenting on the mushroom ravioli in a blush of purple prose:
She set the dish in front of me — it looked pretty good — and turned toward Edward.
-Bella, pg. 171
I carefully speared a ravioli. I put it in my mouth slowly, still looking down, chewing while I thought. The mushrooms were good. I swallowed and took another sip of Coke before I looked up.
-Bella, pg. 172
“They looked good.”
“They were good.”
All was well.
So Edward and Bella sit inside the pretty little restaurant and she asks him some more questions about his mind-reading abilities, though still never actually voices her suspicion of him being a vampire. Edward confesses that he definitely followed her to Port Angeles by “reading Jessica’s mind,” essentially, and has been keeping tabs on Bella because,
“If there is anything dangerous within a ten-mile radius, it will invariably find you.”
-Edward, pg. 174
The conversation goes nowhere, and Edward drives Bella home in his Volvo. The chapter ends with him telling her it’s her turn to answer his questions—despite the fact that he dodged most of hers by smoldering at her with his “angel face” and “golden butterscotch eyes.” I guess he was so charming, even the author let him get away with saying nothing.